The Rollercoaster of Grief: It’s Not a Straight Line
You’ve probably heard of the five stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. These stages, introduced by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, are a helpful way to understand the emotional rollercoaster of loss. But here’s the thing—they’re not a step-by-step guide. You might bounce between stages, skip some, or get stuck in one for a while. And that’s completely normal.
- Denial: At first, it might feel like the loss isn’t real. You might catch yourself thinking, “This can’t be happening.” It’s your brain’s way of protecting you from the full impact of the pain.
- Anger: Once reality sets in, anger often follows. You might feel mad at yourself, at others, or even at the situation. It’s a natural response to feeling helpless.
- Bargaining: This is the “what if” stage. You might find yourself replaying scenarios in your head, wondering if you could’ve done something differently.
- Depression: This is when the weight of the loss really hits. You might feel deep sadness, withdraw from others, or struggle to find joy in things you used to love.
- Acceptance: Over time, you start to come to terms with the loss. This doesn’t mean you’re “over it,” but you’ve found a way to live with it.
The key thing to remember? Grief doesn’t follow a schedule. Some days you might feel okay, and other days it might feel like the pain is fresh all over again. And that’s part of the process.
